Today I took the small opportunity to clean the garage whilst my younger son was asleep. Amidst my tasks, I caught sight of Kasia nearly three years old, determinedly trying to climb onto her bike. We’d had several unsuccessful attempts before, with her tiny feet only just reaching the pedals. Today, she discovered this newfound capability!
From the garage, I observed as she tried to navigate the bike by herself. Instead of rushing to her aid, I watched quietly, allowing her to problem-solve and figure out how to secure herself on the seat. After a few attempts, she managed to climb on, her tiny feet barely touching the pedals. She began to pedal, moving the bike ever so slightly forward. The look of triumph on her face was priceless—a quiet achievement she celebrated on her own, without any intervention from me.
As I continued cleaning, I heard a bang. Katharina had fallen off the bike. Instead of rushing over, I calmly went to pick her up. She wasn’t crying and seemed more startled than hurt. I reassured her that this was a great success, reminding her that even falls are part of the journey. I showed her the scars on my knees from my own falls and shared how I got back on my bike each time. It was a special moment, as I too recalled the resilience those scars represented. Only the day before I was talking to Primrose my PhD supervisor about my own self-harm scars and how they represented a time and an experience.
Reflecting on this, I realized that in life, we all experience falls. But what if we changed our perspective and viewed these falls—not as failures—but as successes and achievements? Each fall tests our character, builds perseverance, and helps us grow. Instead of rushing to save our children or expecting someone to save us, let’s learn to pick ourselves up and celebrate the very act of attempting and risking the fall in the first place.
In the end, isn’t it the falls that make us prouder of our achievements?
Let’s embrace life’s falls, knowing they shape us into stronger, more resilient individuals.
Practice Points:
- We need to celebrate our children’s achievements, but do we need to celebrate everyone of those achievements together. I wonder whether we can teach our children to learn to self-validate and look for internal evidence of success and progress rather than externally from society.
Thanks for coming alongside be and sharing this story.
Laura Ludowyke OT
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